I had to come out of retirement for one last post to review EX3, armed not with optimism, but with a burning necessity to voice my disappointment. Not that it matters anymore, but alas, EX3 strays far from its predecessors in such a disastrous fashion that I feel compelled to purge my frustration through words.
Where do I begin this lamentable tale? EX3 is such a convoluted cinematic travesty that writing a concise review feels like a daunting task. Nevertheless, let’s dissect this catastrophe.
Sylvester Stallone—a name that once resonated as the embodiment of action heroism—now stands shadowed by accusations of selling out, an ego-driven caricature of his former self. Outside his die-hard fans at the StalloneZone, true enthusiasts of gritty '80s action films are left grappling with a sense of betrayal. Their unconditional support for the Expendables franchise, which offered a lifeline to their aging icon, was met with the heart-wrenching realization that he had forsaken them in favor of appealing to the new generation. What debt he owed to this new generation remains an enigma...
However, it would be naive to lay all of EX3's faults solely at Stallone’s feet. The decision-making strings in this production were pulled by various hands, with the greedy Lerner family and the looming studio executives playing significant roles. The big studios must answer to shareholders, and they wouldn’t allow Stallone to dictate their entire fortune. Yet, it must be acknowledged that Stallone’s influence and his ability to steer the ship were compromised by his frantic desire to remain relevant to the new generation in the 21st century.
And I say this based on a pattern that is hard to ignore—a cycle echoing throughout the legend’s career. Ego-driven decisions and complacency have repeatedly blinded him at the summit of his success. The fame gained after Rocky and Rambo, the revival following Cliffhanger and Demolition Man—all were marred by the same affliction. And now, history cruelly repeats itself after he established the Expendables franchise.
Although Sly is known for rising from the ashes, he might be too old for another comeback. I hope this EX3 debacle will bring him back to his senses, guiding his final Rambo project—if it ever gets made—toward embodying the values that placed him among the pantheon of action legends. EX4 would be unnecessary if he is not allowed—or able—to return it to its essence and what it was always meant to be.
PG-13: A Bitter Betrayal
That rating—now a curse on the tongues of hardcore fans. The attempt to blame piracy as a convenient alibi for the movie's poor performance at the box office cannot shield EX3 from its fallout. Yes, the illicit leak may have affected the box office—researchers estimate about a 20% drop, meaning an opening of approximately $20 million. But even then, this would still be a mediocre result, considering the high expectations, expenses, and the pedigree of the cast.
The true culprits? Franchise fatigue, terrible quality, bad reviews, and—most importantly—alienation of the true fans. Unfortunately, history repeats itself, and studios either don’t learn or simply don’t care. Lionsgate’s strategy to capitalize on Fast & Furious’ summer absence faltered, and Stallone and Lerner’s bid to broaden their audience for personal ego and financial gains was a miscalculated plunge.
Whatever the reason behind the PG decision, the verdict is unanimous: the movie paid for it, both in marketing and in quality. Let’s pray that if EX4 ever graces our screens, its architects will learn from this debacle. Yet, it would be naive to expect history to change course as long as the same people remain in charge.
The Film Itself: A Disgrace
A package of poor editing, average CGI, lackluster acting, and a story worthy of the garbage bin.
Li and Schwarzenegger reduced to mere shadows of their former selves—an affront of the highest order, deserving a trial at The Hague of Cinema.
Banderas turned into a walking caricature—a cruel joke.
The veteran Expendables marginalized and overshadowed.
Arnold’s contentment in participating in this travesty is baffling.
The Sly/Mel fight? A disgrace, worse than Sly vs. JCVD in EX2.
A cascade of cinematic disasters. WTF?
The New Blood: A Laughable Charade
I’m speechless. What was this mockery?
Lutz might be the worst actor I’ve seen in years—zero presence, zero charisma. And they let him disrespect our icons like this? At least in EX2, one could develop some sympathy for Hemsworth—he was respectful toward the older Expendables and died quickly to make room for the real heroes.
Rousey was passable thanks to her fighting skills. She had some decent action sequences, but she should remain mute.
The boxer boy? Spare me the indignity—what was that?
If forced to pick one, I’d go with the hacker guy—he was at least tolerable.
This was Stallone’s biggest mistake of his entire career—writing these ill-conceived characters and then casting a bunch of useless wannabes to play them.
Sly, if you’re reading this—along with the millions of posts, tweets, and articles across the internet—open your eyes and let go of your ego.
You need to stay relevant to the fans who made you, not to kids ignorant of your legacy. If, by some miracle, you get the chance to make EX4, here’s what you need to do:
Exterminate the new blood blasphemy in the opening act or design a story that erases them altogether.
Bring in Jackie Chan and give him a proper role.
Make it a hard-R, like you did with Rambo 4.
Hire a few real villains, lobby for the money, and give it to The Rock—he’s willing to play ball.
Do the Right Thing.
A Franchise Falls
Our beloved franchise collapses—a symphony of hardcore '80s action devolving into a discordant mess. Witnessed by Generation X, this is the epitaph of an era.
Overall Rating: 1/5
